Better

Once a month I try to make it to this wonderful ladies group. It's coordinated by a woman who's been married nearly 30 years and has two grown daughters who both love the Lord. Her heart's desire is to mentor those of us who are just getting started in this season of our lives. Just engaged to married a decade or more, we come to listen and share because we want to do better. We want to reflect God's love in our families in how we treat our spouses and raise the kids we have or someday hope to have.

Afterwards I always come home to debrief. Honestly, I usually begin debriefing in the car on the way! It's a good time to ask questions and get feedback that I normally won't seek out. And I need it. I'm not a very impartial judge of my own behavior. We talk about our relationship and how we're doing parenting Justin. What's going well and where we can improve. Really, really, honest, intentional communication.

-What is God teaching me in regards to being Kevin's helpmate?
-Do I nag?
-Is my attitude grateful, content, pleasant?
-What things does Kevin like about my behavior, attitude, appearance?
-Am I micromanaging Justin's behavior or disciplining for heart issues?
-Is our home a haven? (*Confession* What's the clutter teaching our son about how we value the blessings we have been given? What does it say about how I prioritize my time? Spending time doing things I always want to do or taking time to care for us as a family? Ouch...)
-Where can I improve in any of these areas?
-Am I only focused on what makes me happy or am I seeking to honor God by serving my family by doing things they enjoy?

We had an awesome conversation that was very affirming, but also helped me see where I can improve. I do need to be more patient with Justin and not raise my voice when I am upset. I can accomplish the same things with a calm attitude that I try to quickly accomplish by losing my temper. Also, the message I am sending to Justin about our home and how we value it may be lost in disorganization. I can do better.

Lord, thank you so much for providing Kris to share with all of us last night. I am always so encouraged afterwards and eager to go home and talk with Kevin. Thank you for the positive words I recieved and for helping me see areas where I can improve. I want to do a good job at the job you have given me. I want to honor You during my day and see You in all that I do. It isn't just behavior, it's my heart for living a life that brings you praise, not causes Your Word to be blasphemed. I love you and am so grateful for all Your blessings in my life. Thank you for the hope I have in Heaven someday. In Jesus' name, Amen--